Nintendo have announced their upcoming release schedule, or should I say Wii-Lease schedule for their mega selling Wii console.

Hang on, that sounded racist then, didn’t it?

Anyway…

• March

Major League Baseball 2K9 – 2K Sports
New Play Control! Pikimin – Nintendo
(A Lazy repackaging of a Gamecube title)
New Play Control! Mario Power Tennis – Nintendo
M&M’s Beach Party Control – Zoo Games
Ready 2 Rumble Revolution – Atari
I really don’t want to play another Ready To Rumble game
Backyard Baseball ’10 – Atari
I’m guessing Atari couldn’t afford an official license for this one, seriously, Backyard Baseball?
Don King Boxing – 2K Sports
This was terrible on the Xbox 360 and PS3
Puzzle Kingdoms – Zoo Games
Trivial Pursuit – EA
Good to see EA back to doing what it does best, original games, oh wait, maybe not…
My Sims Party – EA
Diddo

• April

Dance Dance Revolution Disney Grooves – Konami
Garfield Gets Real – Zoo Games
Who the hell are Zoo Games?
Roogoo Twisted Towers – Southpeak
Pennzoil’s Build-N-Race: Speed Demons – Zoo Games
Excitebots: Trick Racing – Nintendo
Jelly Belly Ballistic Racing – Zoo Games
“Jelly Belly Ballistic Racing” are you kidding me with this?
Pirates VS Ninjas Dodgeball – Southpeak
Would rather take a direct dodgeball hit to my love spuds than play this game.
Smiley World Island Challenge – Zoo Games
Who’s naming these games?
Hannah Montana The Movie – Disney
Okay, this list is now officially shit.
Real Heroes: Firefighter – Conspiracy Games
Professor Heinz Wolff’s Gravity – Deep Silver

• May

New Play Control! Donkey Kong Jungle Beat – Nintendo
Another Gamecube port, lazy bastards!
Guilty Gear XX Accent Core Plus – Aksys Games
Punch Out – Nintendo
EA Sports Active – EA
Mmm, active must be a euphemism for shit motion control Wii Sports ripoff
Yu-Gi-Oh! 5D’s Wheelie Breakers – Konami
Fritz Chess – Deep Silver
Virtua Tennis 2009 – Sega
X-Men Origins: Wolverine – Activision

• June

Garfield’s Pet Force – Zoo Games
Someone please find the owner of Zoo Games and punch him or her on the back of his or her head
Let’s Tap – Sega
The Conduit – Sega
Tiger Woods PGA Tour ’10 – EA
Transformers: Revenge of the Fallen – Activision

• Spring

Boom Blox Bash Party – EA
I’m actually looking forward to this one
Moto GP – Capcom
Indiana Jones and the Staff of Kings – LucasArts

• Summer

Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince – EA
EA Sports Tennis – EA
GI JOE: Rise of Cobra – EA
Help Wanted – Hudson
MySims Racing – EA
MySims Racing?  There is no God! Who is asking for this game?
Overlord Dark Legend – Codemasters
Klonoa – Namco Bandai

So, when 2009 is all done and dusted how many people will still be happy with their Wii’s?

I’m guessing none.

Related posts:

1. Nintendo Kick Ass And Chew Bubblegum In Japan In 2008!
2. Codemasters Announce Video Game Release Schedule!
3. Old Gamecube Games Now On Wii!
4. Sega Announce Release Schedules!
5. Games To Watch Out For In 2009 – The Conduit – Nintendo Wii