There has been some incredibly shocking stories in the news this week, none more so than the naming of Jessica Rabbit as ‘sexiest cartoon character of all time’ in a survey carried out by Cadburys.

The cartoon singer, who first appeared in 1988′s ‘Who Framed Roger Rabbit?’, nabbed 37% of the vote to beat competition from Betty Boop (21%) and the Cadbury Dairy Milk Caramel Bunny (10%) in the poll of 1,000 people to mark the return of the Cadbury Bunny to adverts this Easter. Other fictional characters to make the list included ‘Scooby Doo‘s Daphne Blake, Wilma Flintstone, Cinderella and Snow White.

Now is it just me or can I speak for all genuine, red blooded men out there when I say there’s no filth on this list whatsoever? Trust me, all you ladies reading – men don’t want the attractive, prissy, bows in her hair and goes shopping with your mum kinda girl; we want the ‘can possibly kick my ass, edgy looking, I’m not sure if that was sex or rape’ type.

So in honour of my perversions, I have drawn up my own list – the real list – of ‘sexiest cartoon characters of all time’.

Cheetara (Thundercats) – She’s like a really fast, hot Cheetah, that’d do me on its own. She’s also however obviously painted up her eyes Emo style – you cant tell me they’re cat markings – so there’s a good chance shes listening to some sort of kick ass riff while running around laying the beat down.

Lois Griffin (Family Guy) – Lois is a perfect example of what I mean; not particularly hot but sex appeal through the roof. Described by her own husband Peter as a “dirty hustler, a filthy, stinky prostitute, a foul venereal disease carrying, street walking whore”, which may be a bit harsh; Lois has so much sex appeal that even Glen Quagmire is obsessed with her. Good going.

Leela (Futurama) – In all honesty I think it may be the voice of Katy Sagel, Peggy from ‘Married with Children’ , that does it for me as much as anything. Her and Christina Applegate opened my eyes through my formative years; although the kung fu style ass kicking does help. Looks better with one eye than when she had two.

Evil Lynn (He-Man) – You expected She-Ra didn’t you? No – Evil Lynn would definitely be better in the sack, and again she’s got the rock chick thing going on. Damn it shes a henchman how cool would a henchman girlfriend be?! And imagine if you bought a shirt you needed taking back to a shop without a receipt?

Smurfette (Smurfs) – Originally created by Gargamel to cause havoc in the all male Smurf village she was then saved by Papa Smurf and became part of the village. She’s obviously still got a little evil in her at least, and a village where she’s the only female? Cmon….

Oh and girls – for all the talk of you wanting ‘Peter Perfect, I know you really want Dick Dastardly’. If you’ve got a top five – I wanna see it posted!

The cast of ‘Star Trek: The Next Generation’ are due to reunite for a special episode of ‘Family Guy’. The episode, titled ‘Not All Dogs Go To Heaven’, will feature guest voices from cast members including Patrick Stewart, Levar Burton and Gates McFadden.

The one-off episode follows the Griffin family as they head to the annual Quahog Star Trek convention. Stewie is furious when he fails to meet his favourite Next Generation stars so devises a plan to transport the entire cast to his bedroom. Michael Dorn, Wil Wheaton, Denise Crosby, Marina Sirtis, Brent Spiner and Jonathan Frakes will also feature.

‘Not All Dogs Go To Heaven’ will air on Fox on Sunday, March 29

Despite critical success, the American version of ‘Life On Mars’ has been cancelled after just one season. I had some fears for the American remake wondering just how the adventures of Gene Hunt and his team would transfer across the channel; but the casting of a big name such as Harvey Keitel was a great move, and when the first episode aired it initially gained a very positive response.

Ratings for Life On Mars USA hadn’t been great, but as the series progressed, it was gradually picking up an audience. However, it turns out that wasn’t enough and it has now been confirmed that ABC is pulling the plug on the programme after just one season. The remaining episodes of the programme will still be aired, and the show will still complete its 17 episode run. Goodbye to yet another potential crossover to the US. Really thought this one would work.

ABC’s ‘V’ remake has found its first cast member. Scott Wolf will star in “V,” which is based on the 1980s NBC series about lizard-like alien “visitors” landing on Earth and, after initially seeming friendly, start to take over the world. Basically David Icke’s wet dream.

According to The Hollywood Reporter, he’ll play a newscaster who sees the alien landing as the ticket to stardom and soon becomes the visitors’ mouthpiece. Wolf is most famous for his role in 90′s ‘oh my god I’m so depressed even though I’m hot’ drama “Party of Five” also starring ‘Lost’s Matthew Fox, Neve Campbell of ‘Scream’ fame and ‘Ghost Whisperer’s Jennifer Love Hewitt.

Finally, released this week is ‘Futurama – Into The Wild Green Yonder’, the last of the four commission direct-to-DVD spin-off movies which, following their success, looks to have brought the excellent animated series back to our screens following its cancellation. It is available on Blu-Ray and DVD from Amazon.com.

P.s – lets hope that the several gigs Michael Jackson is apparently bringing into this country isn’t the size of the illegal material on his hard drive.

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