I’m back. I wrote this column last week, assuming that there wouldn’t be any more news in the coming week, but I didn’t count on Marc Webb being announced as Spider-Man’s new director, So now I’m just gonna wing it….

I thought Raimi’s first Spider-Man was alright, when it came out, and it still has its moments – the second does too; I suppose, but it’s not a movie that I want to ever watch again. I didn’t ‘get’ Tobey as Peter, and I didn’t like any of the other casting except Willem Defoe, I thought the franchise was poor from the ground up, but the third particularly sucked – and no, not the dancing particularly, but the retcon of Sandman killing Ben…then the smoothing out of ‘it wasn’t him‘ at the end. Nice one.

So I had a big ‘director’ thing and what not, but in reality, I have big hopes for this new one. I’m hoping it’ll showcase everything the first ones didn’t for me. So I’ll bash you a list of what I’m looking forward to in the next Spider-Man film….

New Origin: In my opinion each ‘arc’ of movies, whether it be a trilogy, or ten movies, DESERVES an origin movie. I don’t care if it’s the same as Raimi’s or different, but each director, like each writer, has a different slant on the origin, and each slant can be interesting and is worth telling. Especially if this is a reboot. Iron Man’s origin was spectacular, Batman Begins’ was better, because that’s simply the most amazing origin ever, and if Nolan makes a third, I want another origin after that.

Younger, more insecure, Peter Parker: Parker’s a high school student, so pending casting, could be a lot better than Tobey “I can only act in Seabiscuit” Maguire, hopefully Webb’ll cast an unknown rather than an Efron or a Pattinson. An actor who will be able to convey a more accurate Peter Parker, one that’s aware that he’s this super awesome superhero, but still a geek and can’t use his powers to impress women, or even tell his Aunt about what he’s going through, an unsure, yet curious Parker.

New Writer: Raimi has never interested me, his Evil Dead films are crap, and Drag Me To Hell was utter shit. Vanderbilt wrote Zodiac. End of argument.

New Costume: I wasn’t a fan of that one, it wasn’t like he made it himself. Mainly because it wasn’t made by a 200million dollar budget I just didn’t like the way it looked on screen, it was shiny and bright and I just didn’t buy into it, it made Spidey less of a Street Level hero, I thought.

New Villains/Villains done better: Green Goblin. *crosses fingers*

Less CG: Nolan uses minimum CG and that’s why I love him. I do realise that swinging is hard, but i’m sure there’s a lot more they can do than just create image upon image. An $80 million budget is nice and juicy though, films with lower budgets and heavy CGI always look better: District 9 and Cloverfield for examples of this.

A massive kick to the face: I love a kick to the face. Like, flat out love it. I NEED them in my spider-life. God, I just love a good kick combined with some trademark Spidey….

Banter/Sharp dialogue: Spider-Man is known for his banter. His banter in the Raimi films made me think “is this bad dialogue or bad acting?” Because I don’t actually think it was both, but maybe each line took it in turns. Vanderbilt has a fine grasp of his craft, and with news being that he’s taken seeds from the Ultimate Spider-Man comic, then yes, he will.  Funny line in Zodiac “First let me describe the lamp you’re going to buy me”… haha! (if you’ve seen it, otherwise I appreciate that’s not funny)

Although I am upset that Fincher didn’t get the directing duties (I can totally see why), I’m glad Webb got it.

Marc Webb has proved he can handle romance/drama with (500) Days Of Summer, but will he be able to handle the action sequences? Webb is definitely an interesting choice, certainly would make a ‘studio’ movie more than any of the others on the short list – I can’t see Cameron or Fincher being told they can’t have certain things, or do certain things and Webb is probably dying to make his mark on Hollywood. He’s the smarter choice – no new Peter Parker star is going to want to be doing 37 takes at 2AM, like Fincher would demand and it’d be hard to option sequels on him. I’m sure Webb’s taking a fair slice and options on two more, Pending Success, of course.

I’m pleased with Webb. I am. Really. But I would have loved Fincher. A Spider-Man film with that much seriousness and respect would have been great. Performers wouldn’t think “I’m not getting an Oscar, I’ll just phone this in“, because Fincher would do take upon take until it’s right. Cameron too, but it makes sense to give it to Webb. (With his appropriate name), but let’s hope Sony haven’t made the same mistake that they made once ten years ago, giving three bad films. I can’t handle another ten years of Spider-Man films like this.

In other Super Hero News, Green Lantern certainly has the talent involved to be a piece of cinema of Iron Man’s standards – a mature and entertaining film. Writers Guggenheim, Berlanti and Green are all talented, and the script that I acquired online was pretty damn phenomenal for the first twenty five pages, it’s definitely a film you’d want to see. So let’s hope that doesn’t go tits up so close to me being excited.

I’ve already lost interest in the Captain America movie after his ideas of and for the movie, it makes me feel like he saw the TV movie back in 1990 and called it a day at that. With Marvel Studio’s involved on all Marvel films now, it’s stupid to not allow integration from Brubaker’s groundbreaking run on Cap, or even Straczynski’s run on Thor, considering they hired Matt Fraction for assistance on Iron Man 2, where his Invincible Iron Man series has blown minds for 22 issues so far, with absolutely no signs of deceleration.

Kick Ass, I have no interest in. Mark Millar is not a writer I enjoy, and the film’s premise, although interesting, does not really make me go ”oooh, joy”, Nic Cage doesn’t particularly do movies that interest me anymore. Which is a shame.

Thor will go either way, I believe, It has Natalie Portman, so it’ll probably be the greatest thing ever, but then….I’m waiting on the script. If it’s Olde English Thor then… na, if it’s LOTR-type dialogue, it’ll be a lot, lot better.

The Losers could hopefully be a good solid action film, the first 2 trades are phenomenal…I’ve never managed to get the other ones, and it’ll bother me that I won’t be able to get a decent print. Damn!

I would probably go to see another Incredible Hulk movie, given the same cast/director as the first, I think they just need a little more breathing room and experimenting to get some more done, although I’m sure it won’t happen, I remember all that Norton-Marvel kerfuffle years back. And I’d love another Superman movie, by Singer, with Routh, but a reboot is probably more likely for that, I’m sure DC have enough to tide us over with Green Lantern and a possible Third Batman for now, and will decide what to do given the success of the rebooted Spidey. Let’s hope,eh?

I need to take a breath and leave it here for now I think.

Related posts:

1. B-Weekly Bugle – Issue 4 – My Problem With Superhero Movies
2. Bi-Weekly Bugle – Issue 3
3. Bi-Weekly Bugle – Issue 1
4. Bi-Weekly Bugle – Issue 2
5. Superhero Movie News Round Up!